Kent here, and Seth took off the flaming pants that keep Russell hot, and is now our new Iron Man. Funny how WWE put over HHH so much this week but refused to mention a certain Crippler. Ah well. Keri is back judging Anonyruss and Harper Lee on their responses to her questions. Over on our podcast, Are You Not Kentertained we discussed iron man, Elimination Chamber preview, and made fun of Smackdown. Please enjoy.
- So there was a gauntlet match on RAW this week but let’s not discuss specifically this match. Instead, let’s discuss “Ironman” Seth Rollins in this match.
Anonyruss: Well if Jordan can’t be on RAW then I’ll take an hour plus of my other guy Seth Rollins. He looked great out there. He basically gave us 2 quality PPV matches in one. First, he fought Roman Reigns. This in and of itself was fantastic as far as a match goes. The back and forth was great and lots of decent spots that were fun. After Rollins got the pin here and I heard John Cena’s music I thought for sure that this would be a quick win for Cena, you know because of #lolCenaWins. I was very wrong. The match with Cena was also a very good showing. Then when he won that I was floored. I hope this showing for Rollins helps get him back into the main event scene because he had a really lackluster 2017. Things are coming up Rollinshouse (until Sunday, when they come up Reignhouse from there until after WrestleMania.)
Harper Lee: Screw it, at the risk of losing a point, I’m disregarding the question and talking about the whole match. While this was an early candidate for match of the year, in my opinion, they screwed up. Keri, you should appreciate this, I am taking something that has been universally praised and still going to bitch about it. I would have changed up the booking. I would have started with Finn vs Miz, had Finn win and out comes Braun. Braun beat Finn. Elias is out next and we do some big guy stuff and while Elias has a good showing, Braun wins and gets a win back. While Braun is celebrating, Elias hits him with a chair. You can bring Roman or Cena out next to take Braun out quickly. Probably Roman and his wet hair. Roman takes advantage of a hurt Braun thanks to Elias’ post-match beat down. Out comes Seth, and then we have Seth do his hour + long bit of magic. Cena being the last guy to lose also plays into his current storyline where he keeps falling short. This would have been a proper match build up where it got exciting and had the near falls. This match was great, but it could have been better had they followed my plan. Also, they said that HHH had an iron man match but they never said who. Come to find out, it was Chris Benoit. Keri, why didn’t the WWE mention Mr. Benoit? My daddy said it was that no good Kevin Sullivan that did those terrible things.
Keri’s Verdict: While the overall match was great, Seth’s performance Monday night was amazing and it came with wins over Cena and Roman. I think it may have been the best performance in his WWE career. Needless to say, I was very, very impressed. And with that said, I always love me some creative booking changes and for that Harper gets the point.
- Titus Worldwide had a good showing against the Bar this week on RAW. Is tag team gold coming to Titus Worldwide?
Anonyruss: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAA, what? HAHAHAHAHA, no! Titus World Wide get gold? Oh man, you are hilarious question writer! In all seriousness, Titus Worldwide has tons of talent. Apollo is money, WWE just doesn’t know how to properly utilize him. Titus is an ok wrestler with decent charisma. Together they have been fun, but I think WWE is just making them look good so that when The Bar walks all over them on Sunday it won’t be so boring. Gotta make the competition at least look like they have a chance.
Harper Lee: Well well well, if you go back to last week’s blog and read the bonus portion, I did say that Apollo should get himself a push. This week validated my opinion. This is an automatic point for me because of last week. Yes, I am better than that stupid Mr. Clio.
Keri’s Verdict: The RAW tag team division as a whole is a mess. You have the Balor Club fighting the Revival, Ginger Rhyno keeping everyone’s seats warm in catering, and the Bar wrestling Titus Worldwide. This division needs energy stat and I think a title change may do it. Harper gets the point here not just for what she said above but also for her overall sense of positivity.
- So at Fastlane, we have the Uso vs the New Day for the 15,000th time. What are your thoughts on this?
Anonyruss: My thoughts are Smackdown SUCKS! It has almost been unwatchable for the past 3 weeks (I’m being generous here.) So the fact that they have to rely on Uso’s vs New Day just tells me they are still creatively bankrupt. Now as far as the match goes. I’m fine with it. They have had some great matches at PPV’s the last few times they went at it. So I am pretty sure this will be a great match, but if it isn’t it’s not like it will ruin a good story.
Harper Lee: Well, this is another easy point. Anonyruss clearly didn’t watch last week’s episode of Smackdown or he would have seen a well-done wrestling show. His credibility is thinner than Baron Corbin’s hair. I am so sorry Mr. Lone Wolf. This is WWE at it’s worst when they refuse to let the new talent rise up and have a changing of the guard. Last year New Day didn’t have a match at Mania. I think something is up, and I fear that the Uso’s won’t get a chance to defend their belts at Mania, and that would be a terrible crime. Way worse than when daddy and his brothers got caught bootlegging moonshine and have some method for creating crystals. Crystals are so pretty, well except the creepy girls named Crystal. Never trust them.
Keri’s Verdict: New Day vs the Usos, the Usos vs New Day, sigh. Doesn’t matter how you order it, the matchup is played out and downright boring. But I agree with Anonyruss, it will be an exciting match so that is probably the silver lining for all of us. And with that said, one point Anonyruss.
- On Smackdown this week we found out who will be facing who for the US and Women’s titles at Fastlane. Pick one of these matchups and discuss.
Anonyruss: Wait, they did? When did that happen? Let me go check what and who. Ok, back from checking. So Bobby is going to face Randy. Can we be real for a second. We all know Jinder is somehow going to be included in this right? So what the hell is the point of announcing this match when we all know next week or even the following week they are going to add him! Ok, back to wrestling world. I like the match up. The more Bobby can do with some of the “great” talent the better. They need to groom him to be a top heel. Randy is at his best when he is a heel so this feels like a good thing for Bobby. The women’s title match: Woooo Jr. vs My High school-self’s dream girl, Ruby Riot. Why would I care about this match? We all know Lil’ Woo is going to win.
Harper Lee: Well, a face vs face match up makes sense since there is only one face in the main event against 4 heels. My question is simple, who is Shinsuke fighting? Am I the only one feeling Shinsuke’s momentum collapsing before our very eyes? Maybe I need to get my eyes examined. He won the Royal Rumble and has done nothing since. It’s a tad ridiculous. Still, with all of that being said, we are in a new era where Charlotte may be the single greatest champion that we have in WWE. She is so talented, and to all of the haters out there, this girl has worked and trained hard for her spot. Her last name has nothing to do with it. That’s balderdash!!! That was my word of the day on my calendar a few days ago. I love it. It’s like boulders are having a 100 yard dash. Anyway, the queen is going to destroy this peasant, Ruby Riot, and then the whole squad can go back into obscurity. Quite frankly, I want to see Asuka take on Charlotte. If that happens, let’s make history one more time and have the historic, first ever women main eventing a Wrestlemania. Come on, let’s do it. You know you want to see it. Well #MeToo. I love that hashtag. It’s nice that I can just agree with people. Hey Harper, I like strawberry ice cream and I’m like #MeToo. I love social media!
Keri’s Verdict: These matchups are very simple to describe. These are the “titles are not going to change hands because of Mania but we still want to see what both people are capable of in a championship match setting.” The US title match is as Anonyruss said a way for Roode to work with a heel like Randy. As for the women’s title match, this is Ruby’s chance to see if she belongs in the title picture. Now to award this week’s question number 4 point. I don’t know where Harper was going with her response but she does bring up a good point with Shinsuke. And Anonyruss’ answer really is on point so one point to him.
- The Cruiserweight tournament has officially begun. Who do you got and why?
Anonyruss: Wait, they did? When did that happen? Let me go check what and who. Ok, back from checking. They certainly did. Man, I keep telling myself to watch 205, but Smackdown has sucked so hard that by the end I just don’t want to watch any more wrestling that week. Alright, so I’m taking TJP. They seemed to want to get behind him when the whole 205 thing started, but because the show was just starting and TJP couldn’t be himself they lost interest in him. Recently it has seemed that he has had a bit of a resurgence as a heel. I like it! So I’m taking him to go ahead and win another WWE based tournament.
Harper Lee: I’ll tell you who isn’t winning it, Hideo Itami. He is one of the most underutilized talents currently I think they need to start a new era with Enzo and RIch officially gone. I was going to pick Tony Nese….and he’s already out. Sigh. Fine, I will go with the first ever UK champion Tyler Bate……and he’s already out. Well, I am going with Akira Tozawa….and he’s out. What the heck is going on? Honestly, look at the bracket and tell if you would rather watch the current participants including Buddy Murphy, or if you would rather see a tournament with all of the losers of the first round. If I ask you, do you want Cedric, TJP, Roderick, Kalisto, Mustafa, Buddy, Drew Gulak, and Mark Andrews or would you rather have Gran Metalik, Tyler Bate, Hideo, Lince Dorado, Jack Gallagher, Daivari, Tony Nese, and Akira? If that doesn’t get me a point, I do not know what will. I think Cedric is winning.
Keri’s Verdict: There have been some shocking upsets in this tournament and it seems like they may be taking this division in a new direction. It’s not like the old way was really working anyways and honestly, I think that belt may be cursed at this point. But with that said, I’m picking Mr. Alexa Bliss, Buddy Murphy to win this thing. Why you ask? Because he made his debut in this tournament for a reason and I think the title is the reason why he debuted. So, time to award a point and you know what I can decide on this question. We have negativity on Harper side which is really unlike her and I’m just not feeling Anonyruss’ answer either. So, I’m going to do a blog first and award no points for this question.
Bonus Time: Each week Anonyruss and Harper Lee will choose a topic that hasn’t been discussed in this week’s blog. In the event of a tie after 5 questions, Keri will use these extra thoughts to help her declare a winner.
Anonyruss: It feels like Elimination Chamber should be a decent PPV, but something just feels off. I’m not sure what it is, but I’m just not feeling this PPV. Don’t get me wrong I’ll watch it and I’m sure there will be several matches that will be great, but I just don’t have that same vibe I get when I watch other PPV’s on The Road to WrestleMania.
Harper Lee: I would like to see WWE eliminate all PPV’s between the Royal Rumble and Wrestlemania. It would force them to book intelligently instead of changing their minds at the last second and make stupid decisions, like Cena winning the belt suddenly last year or my man Luke being an afterthought. This would force WWE to provide solid weekly shows on the Road to Wrestlemania. Or give us a 205 exclusive PPV and UK only PPV instead of RAW or Smackdown. This would still give us PPV’s, but a nice change of pace. Come on, you know you would like to see an all UK or 205 PPV.
Keri’s Final Verdict: I like Harper’s idea of having story building for the biggest show of the year. This is the “road to WrestleMania” and we don’t know what the matches are yet or why we should care about the said matchups. Enough of these PPVs between Rumble and Mania. Seriously WWE, you have your biggest shows of the year in a little over a month and you really need to build for that. Why you ask? Because, as of right now (and if you believe the internet), the most anticipated match of the weekend isn’t even in your promotion. With that said, one point for Harper and with that point the win. I couldn’t agree with you more, Harper. Creative needs to be creative again.
Anonyruss: I really have no final thoughts this week. Check out Keri’s though. She has some deep thoughts and they are not Jack Handy’s.
Harper Lee: Sometimes taking a step back from what we are most passionate about is important. It does offer some clarity. We do get obsessive at times. Whether it be Russell on Are You Not Kentertained with Seth’s flaming pants, or Kent with Filipino transvestites, or Keri with her Asian-itis, it’s good to take a step back and realize that this isn’t the end of the world. When Cena wins #17, people are going to be mad. Make no mistake about it, every single guy with double-digit title runs have had numerous lousy runs that were short lived and not memorable, and that includes the Nature Boy. Really there is only one thing that ever mattered. Whoever slays the Beast in April will be my hero. I am hoping it is Braun because Brock did the one thing that should never have been done.
Keri: So, last week I went to a very, very dark place on this blog and I may have ruined Mania for some of our readers. And for that, I apologize and would like to thank Harper for making me realize how scary I was becoming. And no, the fact that I was growing a rather long neckbeard had nothing to do with it (even though it was rather unsightly). It’s just that I’ve been watching what is happening with my beloved Bullet Club right now and I have to admit that the negativity and bad vibes from that storyline translated itself over into my blogging. Then, I watched this week’s episode of BTE (Being the Elite, for those of you who don’t know) and had an epiphany while I watched a chair thrown by Cody at Kenny sail by with Tama Tonga in the background. What I noticed in this particular scene was not the chair being thrown or the individuals in the scuffle but Tama sitting there with his sunglasses on looking like he could give two fucks less about what was going on in front of him. And seeing his reaction to everything got me thinking, why do I care about this so much? Why am I so affected by all this negativity and bad vibes? Then I thought you know what I think should be more like Tama. And you know what that is exactly what I’m going to do. Team Kenny or Team Cody? I’m sure some of you out there have chosen your side in this Bullet Club Civil War. But for me, all I have to say is I don’t care anymore and quite frankly it’s all just getting a little too silly for me. All I will say though is may the best man win. (Kent: So the Bullet Club is stealing more from the NWO? We can’t forget Black and White vs Wolfpack. Christ, just go watch the NWO story on WWE Network and save some time. I’d say that Kenny is more Wolfpack and Cody is Black and White OG NWO. I’m not saying that it’s bad, but this feels like more copying.)
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