The Wrestling 9 Deuce – May 22 & 23, 2017 – The Drifter Debuts Edition

 

Welcome everybody to the only wrestling blog that openly discusses the differences between Punjab and having a Poon Job.  Yes, we are the ever classy, The Wrestling 9 Deuce.  Russ, Keri, and myself delve oh so deep into the week that was in the wacky world of professional wrestling.  Oh, and look who is rehabbing and hopefully due back in June!  I can’t wait for Emma to return.

Of course, we also did our podcast, Are You Not Kentertained, where we discuss some of these topics and others, plus do our weekly segments.  It’s like a verbal companion to the blog. Please check us out at facebook.com/9deuceblog , on Twitter @official9deuce, or Instagram at Official9Deuce.  Share this, like this, write us an email with a question at wrestling@9deuce.com.  Thank you.

Please enjoy!

The 9

  1.  How good did my boy Elias Sampson look in his in ring debut?  Was Dean the right guy to debut against?    Also, Maryse looked great.

Russ:  Overall, I thought Elias looked good.  Loved the part where he tried to sing and the crowd wasn’t having it. His in ring skills seemed pretty legit.  Dean’s style seems to match with almost anyone on the roster (which makes him a great candidate when you want to showcase someone’s talent.)  Still too early to tell much though and with the obvious interference coming I knew I wasn’t going to see how things measured up in the end.  Still I liked what I saw.  Only complaint:  I understand why Elias would attack Dean after the interference from a heel perspective, but in real life if The Miz attacked me to prove a point to my opponent, I’d go after the guy who took a cheap shot on me.  (Kent: I think he gets involved in the Dean and Miz rivalry to give Elias some stellar guys to work with immediately.)

Keri:  I thought Elias was stellar in his debut match. He matched up really well with Dean and was pretty impressive. I don’t remember him being this good when he was in NXT. However, I stopped watching NXT weekly around when he arrived so that may be the reason. Overall, though it was nice to see him in the ring finally and not wandering around backstage just playing the guitar. Also, yes I agree, Maryse looked very nice.

Kent:  Drink it in maaaaaaan.  Welcome to the Kent table Elias.  You can sit with Baron, Alexa, Tye, and Luke.  The Revival will be there soon too, so save some room.  I thought that they would give Elias a series of jobber matches to show off his moveset.  Instead they gave him the biggest champ on RAW, and it worked.  Dean does his best work in brawl style matches.  Elias actually has a lot of technical prowess to with his timing on knee strikes.  Yes, there was a rest hold, and Elias will need better cardio, but if they want to make another star, they have a guy to mold into “the next big thing”.  One big problem is the lack of a mid card on RAW, so they will have to move Elias higher than he may be ready for, but I am cool with them trying him out.  Also, Maryse looked great……I feel like somebody already said that.

  1.  Paul Heyman cut a promo that only Paul Heyman could cut.  The WWE experimented with giving him Cesaro and Curtis Axel, and it never clicked.  All things considered, would you put Paul with any act on RAW?  You can also pick one for Smackdown for fun.

Russ:  Basically, we are looking to see who would be a good Paul Heyman guy.  I honestly believe that Roman Reigns would be a great Paul Heyman guy.  Roman does ok on his own, but you put a mouthpiece like Heyman with him and you get some magic.  Heyman can get you excited to see Ellsworth vs. a piece of wood.  (Kent: I’d watch the hell out of that match.)  So imagine what he could do for Roman.  It would effectively stop all of the Roman-haters (who hate him for all the wrong reasons) and Heyman would elevate what would already be a pretty good match (since Roman usually has good matches) to a spectacle.  

Keri:  Why is it always a Paul Heyman guy and not a Paul Heyman girl?  With that question asked, I say we make Charlotte a Paul Heyman girl. She has the in ring skills to be extremely dominate in either women’s division. However, on the mic, she’s well terrible and as a result her character needs a lot of work. With Paul Heyman as her mouthpiece, she could really elevate herself to Alexa levels in the Smackdown women’s division and that division needs elevating especially before Asuka gets there. (Kent: In all fairness, I specifically said act rather than guy.  I simply couldn’t come up with a girl on the roster who was good enough in ring but mediocre enough on the mic, aside from Bayley who doesn’t fit the Paul mold.  Charlotte still sucks in the ring and would be another Cesaro at best.  You know what, scrap that.  What about Asuka????  I know that you just got on board with that idea Keri.) (Keri: I’m not mad at it.)

Kent:  The Revival is the act that I think would benefit the most, and are so good that Paul doesn’t even have to come out every week.  It would be cool to know that he advocates for them.  If Nia Jax had any talent, I may have picked her.  On Smackdown, there are 2 acts that just need that extra something to get over the.  They would be Rusev and Luke.  Rusev can actually talk really well, but Luke is still limited.  If you have Paul singing Luke’s praises week after week, you know that he becomes a main eventer.

  1.  Another week, another another tag team question for everyone. So, we saw the stipulation set for Extreme Rules between the Hardys and Sheasaro and we also saw a classic case of who done it with the discovery of an unconscious Enzo. Discuss all or any part of this.

Russ:  I’m not sure why the Hardly’s wanted a steel cage stipulation for their match. (How does that benefit them?) Also, how does a steel cage match work in a tag team match?  Does only one guy have to escape?  Both?  Seems stupid either way.  As for Enzo getting laid out.  Anyone is a suspect even anyone in the crowd because who doesn’t want him to shut the fuck up!   This is the mystery of the century!     

Keri:  Really, the Hardys (specifically Matt) beat Sheasaro (specifically Sheamus) yet again this week. What is going on with Sheamus and the Hardy Boys? Why can’t he beat them? This is a question I have that I really need answered because I’m still confused from last week. Either way, we now have a steel cage match as the situation for tag team title match at Extreme Rules. This should be interesting, I guess. But my question is still, why should I care and does Sheasaro actually stand a chance of beating the Hardys? I think not. Also, my guess on the who done it front is, Ciampa from NXT is the one who laid out Enzo. I mean look what he did to Gargano at Takeover. It has to be him. He’s becoming the Braun of the tag team division and beating up everyone. I believe that his frustration taken to a new level don’t you think?

Kent:  I just don’t see how a cage match is beneficial to the Hardly’s.  Something that requires speed and risk taking would be more beneficial, which I thought meant that we would be getting a ladder match.  Like the one time it makes sense to copy NXT and they blow it.  Sheamus is a 4 time former world champ.  He can’t beat Matt Hardly.  It makes no sense!!!  Next week, Sheasaro will finally get the upper hand so they can job at the PPV.  As for who laid out Enzo?  I have numerous ideas.  I think it would be funny if multiple guys take credit for it next week.  Like Kurt asks for whoever did it to come out and admit their guilt.  You could have G&A come out and say that they beat up a nerd.  The Miz could come out.  Hell, it would be hilarious if James Ellsworth came out.  The real answer should be Dash Wilder to give us a feud when Dawson is healed.  

  1.  My boy, Titus took a hit to his brand last night.  How are we feeling about the Titus Brand Gimmick?  Is it working for you?  

Russ:  At first I have to admit that I hated this gimmick.  He was super annoying about it and all he did was lose.Now though, he is still losing all the time, but they seem to be taking the gimmick in positive direction.  I like the portrayal of Titus doing what it takes to get his brand to new heights.  I’m not so sure having Apollo lose this week was the right call, but I’ll see where they are leading it.  Apollo and Titus are a perfect fit let’s give them a chance to be successful.    

Keri:  I’m good with the Titus Brand storyline but for some reason I think it’s missing something.  I think that something is more people need to be added to the Titus Brand. I mean this has the makings of a good stable but for some reason the trigger has been pulled. Apollo is already involved. So I say add a few more lower mid card guys and see where this thing goes from there.

Kent:  I liked the backstage stuff with Kalisto, Apollo, and Titus.  Then the match happened, and I didn’t like the whole “Titus yells, Apollo is suddenly a moron” bit.  It honestly made no sense.  Every manager would be imploring Apollo to stay on him, so why would that be a distraction?  This is why Apollo loses so damn much.  He’s a F’N moron.  I loved Booker and Corey’s commentary to during this because it really helped.  Here’s the problem.  “Friends” of Apollo are going to keep asking him why he is staying with Titus.  Well if he has a winning streak, he can point to that.  If he’s losing over miscommunication, what does Apollo point to as a reason to stay?  I gotta be honest for a moment and give a cliche answer that I hate, but this seems like a case where it’s too early to form an accurate opinion if they have this mapped out for the next month or two.

  1.  Do you have any issue with Finn having a match against Karl Anderson?

Russ:  Not really.  Most people know they are friends backstage and matches that usually pit friends against each other end up being better.  This is because friends want what is best for each other and want to make the other guy look good.  So a match like this you know Finn isn’t going to let this be a total squash match.  The only minor complaint is that there is no rhyme or reason for this match in kayfabe.  

Keri:  I don’t hate it but I also don’t understand it. This match just seemed so random and led me to have even more questions. Why was this match booked? Did something happen during pre-show that I wasn’t aware of? If there was, why didn’t they explain it? I mean Finn really shouldn’t have any issues with G&A and vice versa but it just seemed like there was something there.  Again, it just seemed random. If this continues into next week, the pay-off better a club reunion or I don’t care. And that is hard for me to say about anything involving Finn.

Kent:  I’m torn on this.  I say that my answer is a tentative yes, and I’ll elaborate briefly.  It’s fairly well known that Finn has a relationship with G&A, even casual fans are aware of this, by and large.    I’d be fine if they had given us a reason for the match.  Something like G&A pissed off Kurt so he punished them by taking on Finn.  I needed a reason.  Yes, this could play out into something more down the road.  I think that is all the more reason to have given us a reason why these guys had to face each other, rather than random throwaway match.  

  1.  The opening segment introduced us to the 6 participants for the Men’s Money in the Bank match.  Give me your thoughts on the segment and the participants.

Russ:  I liked the segment.  All the guys got to say their piece and it all worked well. Loved Owens coming out and proving his point.  Loved that they gave Shinsuke his full entrance. With this group of guys I honestly don’t know who I want to win the Money in the Bank this year.  All of them have a legitimate chance to win and all of them would make a great Mr. Money in the Bank.  What I like about this, and normally this is a bad thing, but with all these great talents in the ring for one match we will: 1.  Get a great match no matter the outcome.  2.  Get to see some of the overshadowed talent get some ring time on a PPV.  Think about who isn’t in this match that you would want to see in a match that might get overshadowed.  Tye, BreezeDango, Rusev, Aiden, Luke, Rowen, etc.   They can all get a match on the PPV now because so much of the top talent is occupied by this one match.  I’m all for that right now!  

Keri:  The thing that really bothered me about this whole segment was where was Rusev? We get video packages where he asks for a championship match at Money in the Bank and then says he’s coming to Smackdown to talk to Shane about said opportunity and then we get nothing. No explanation or anything. Rusev could have easily been the surprise entrant into the MITB match. I’m not mad at the choices and think they are good choices. I just like some continuity in my wrestling. At least, once in awhile I do.

Kent:  I really wish that Luke was in this match so he could show the fans, yet again, that he can hang, and outperform some of the people higher up the ladder.  In ring, he’s better than Shinsuke and Baron, no doubt, and I love both of those guys.  He’s probably on par with Dolph, only with very different styles.  Aside from that minor complaint, we are treated to 6 out of the 8 most talented guys on SD at the moment.  That’s awesome and should be the best match of the night.  It could be a match of the year candidate when all is said and done.  I liked how KO got himself into the match.    Overall, I’m looking forward to it.  I kinda thought that we’d see Cena here, but maybe not til SummerFest.  Yup, that’s still funny.

  1.  We had a women’s tag team match.  Tamina was simply ringside.  Is this  mistake on WWE’s part to not get her more ring time and improve her brand, or is it smarter to leave your least talented out of the match?  Also, are they missing a great opportunity to have an historic, first time ever women’s MitB match?

Russ:  I’ve heard rumors that they are setting up for a first time historic women’s MitB match. They haven’t shown it on the show yet, but maybe they are giving us a slow burn set up.  As for Tamina not being in the match.  Yeah I guess they should have had her in the match, but do I care?  No, not really.   

Keri:  My answer to both questions is yes. Let’s face it Tamina isn’t going to improve if you do not put her in the ring. As for women’s MITB, they have done everything else that is considered “historic” for the division.  Why couldn’t they do this too? It’s shameful. But, at least we don’t have to hear the words “first time ever” and “historic” for the next few weeks on Smackdown so there is that.

Kent:  I know that people will easily dismiss this and say “but it’s only Tamina” AND that’s the fucking problem.  She can wrestle.  She is capable.  The problem is that she is never allowed to get out there in a 10-15 minute match and put on a show. Hey WWE, if you want to get the fans invested in her and you have so much faith blonde Hootie McBoob the queen, then put her in there with Tamina with nobody allowed at ringside.  That’s a way to get fans to care, and hopefully dislike Tamina.  Now that she is seen as a threat, her matches suddenly have fucking meaning.  This isn’t all that complicated, is it?  You must build up characters in order to put them up against people to help make them credible.  Morons!!!!!!!!!

  1.  Baron has lost to Sami 2 times within 3 days.  On SD, it was very quick and followed by a beatdown.  Has this become the best feud on Smackdown?

Russ:  I was ready to say no this is not the best feud on Smackdown and then it hit me.  What other feuds are there really?  Shinsuke vs. Dolph? Nope.  KO vs. AJ?  Ok, this is close, but it hasn’t hit the heights that Zayn and Baron hit last night.  I really wanted to say BreezeDango vs. Ugo’s, but I don’t know if that will continue on past last night now… So, yeah I guess it is.  I’m not sure that is a good thing though…

Keri:  I think it has. I’ve always said that frustrated Corbin is best Corbin. (Kent: Alright, since I already heard Eric also do the ____ (insert noun) is best (insert noun) reference, it is my obligation and duty to recommend “They’re Watching” on NetFlix.  I promised Eric that he would not be disappointed, and now I can’t make that same promise to you Keri, because you watch E!, but it is a glorious finale in the film.)  He’s just that much more brutal when he’s frustrated and I like that. As for the feud, I’m enjoying it and I don’t mind watching it for a little while longer.

Kent:  As the man who is Baron’s biggest backer on this here blog, I am loving this!  Baron has been built well enough to sustain some losses.  First he was given some big wins, then he ate losses to Cena, AJ, Dean, and Randy.  OK, all of those guys are higher up and are fine to lose to and still  feel like a bad ass.  Sami is a league beneath those guys, currently, but this will help him inch closer to their ranks.  In the meantime, it adds more dimensions to Baron’s character.  This is a HUGE win all around for everyone.  Remember the Braun Strowman vs Sami feud?  Yeah.  This is why RAW is inferior to Smackdown because they don’t like to have their monsters lose, unless it’s to Kalisto by fluke.  

  1.  Jinder had a celebration.  What did you think about it?  What are your thoughts on Jinder being a champ?  Do you believe the reports that he got the title win that Baron was in line for?

Russ:  Hey, did you know that I’m one sixteenth Indian?  I was so happy for Jinder.  He represents me.  (Kent: No, you do not have any Indian family.  I researched this.)  Yes I do Kent!  I am one sixteenth Iroquois.  So what do you go to say to that, NERD?  (Kent: OK, that means that you are one sixteenth Native American.  You are not Indian.) Nope, nope, nope.  You see that mascot for the Cleveland baseball team, the Clevelands INDIANS?  Yeah, you don’t see Dhalsim from Street Fighter 2 as their mascot.  No, you see an Indian, much like I am.  (Kent: God damnit.  Can we agree just to call you a Redskin and let the actual people people of India be called India?)  Sure, whatever.  I used to have poon job when I was younger.  The girls man, it was awesome!  (Kent: Russ, it’s spelled Punjabi, and it’s a language.  What you did with those girls…..I just don’t have the time to explain this one.)  Do you remember that Punjabi Prison match between Big Show and Undertaker because the Great Khali got hurt?  He got hurt from all the poon.  Bet you didn’t know that Mr. Know It All.  (Kent:  I…….I got nothing.  Touche.)

Keri:  I thought the celebration was enjoyable and very colorful. As for Jinder as champ, I’m just as shocked as everyone else but unlike some people, I’m good with it. Honestly, Jinder has paid his dues to get to this point. He had to endure 3MB and the Eva Marie announcing botch (Ginger Mahal anyone) among other things. Since, he has been back he has been putting in the work (Finn concussion aside).  He had a good match with Orton at Backlash. I think he has earned this opportunity. As for him taking Baron’s title run, I don’t believe that for an instant. Baron is still technically new on the main roster and is still paying his dues. He is still being built up and once they finish building him, he’s going to have a great title run. Why rush the inevitable? He will win the belt eventually and everyone will rejoice (or will explode into a flutter of I told you so’s (I’m looking at you Kent)).

Kent:  First, watch Jinder’s match from Backlash and then watch Smackdown.  Now drink a shot every time JBL says modern day Maharaja.  Yes, I looked up the spelling just to be accurate.  Anyway, since when did we start hating on Inidia?  Like, doesn’t this showcase how ignorant wrestling fans are for booing a guy for sending a message to his “home country” in his “native tongue”?  It would be nice if just once Randy had a celebration on this level.  This whole situation bothers me.  I am super happy for Jinder to get the opportunity.  On the other hand, I hate that by virtue of being foreign, he gets boo’d and has to run with it.  It would be so nice, as a fan, to simply move away from this sort of booking.  As for him getting Baron’s title run, it’s fine if it is true.  Baron is a clear cut future champ.  Jinder may never get another single’s title run.  The longer that Baron has to work for it, the better because he continues to prove his worth in having entertaining feuds.  I also don’t like guys getting the belt too quickly.  It’s Jinder’s time to shine.

Bonus Deuce

  1.  Did the Uso’s and Breezedango segments work for you?  Do you fear that Breezedango may get pigeon holed into a comedy gimmick?

Russ:  Everything Breezedango works!  Week after week they have continually brought me the best segments on Smackdown and it still hasn’t hit the level of trying too hard and fatigue.  Unfortunately, the way they have been booked the past 3 days has me fearing that these guys are screwed and the WWE isn’t taking advantage of how entertaining these two guys are.  They will beat this until it is dead and then continue to beat it, instead of evolving the gimmick.  Breeze and Dango have proven they are willing to take a gimmick and make it work.  Now, WWE don’t screw this up!  Elevate these guys!

Keri:  Let me start out by love love love the Fashion Files. I want more of them. Hopefully,  I will get more of them. With that said, I’m enjoying the segments between the Ugos (I mean Usos) and Breezedango. There is the right amount of comedy to my feud and I enjoy that as well. Do I believe that Breezedango will get pigeonhole into this gimmick. Not at all. This gimmick works right now while they are faces. If they turn heel, it can be manipulated to the point where comedy is taken out and they are just brutal to everyone. Remember Tyler Breeze is a fantastic heel. He can and will make it work.

Kent:  I want to use the word tease, but everything following that would be incredibly lewd.  Let’s go with lapdance instead.  It was like Joselyn James is grinding on you and then she removes her top, and Breeze gets the win.  Then the panties come off and Fandango gets the win.  You are on the verge of happy ‘spolsion time, and then she gets up and punches you in the throat and The Uso’s get the win.  You’re welcome.

  1.  During Smackdown, during commercials that were mid-match, they still showed the match.   I think I speak for all of us that it’s about time.  My question is a simple one.  Does this make the commercials more or less effective?

Russ: I paid attention to my screen more than I normally would when a commercial came on.  Other than that commercials, in general, barely have any effect on me and I couldn’t tell you what the commercials were about at all. I will say that I didn’t fast forward the commercials that had the matches going on.  That has to be something right?  

Keri:  People usually fast forward through commercials. So, by having the match playing during the commercial break commercials may actually be more effective. I mean at least people are technically watching them in this case.

Kent:  Initially I thought that it made them less effective.  You were watching the match and paying zero attention to the commercials, or very little attention.  Then I think I found some brilliance to this.  Unless you are watching this live, you fast forward through the commercials.  Now they have significantly increased the likelihood that you will sit through a set of commercials.  I think that this is added value but at a cost.  I say more effective.

Also, for those who like Lana, here are some exclusive pics from wwe.com.

http://www.wwe.com/gallery/lana-stunning-new-photos#fid-40108662

All pictures used in this blog are for review purposes. They are property of WWE and wwe.com.

WWE Hell In A Cell 2016 Review – The Screw You Boston Edition

WWE Hell In A Cell 2016 Review

Welcome ladies and gentlemen. My name is Kent Waldron, and I am the advocate for the wrestling 9 Deuce. Today, we need to talk about the HISTORIC, FIRST TIME EVER, caps lock filled, Hell in A Cell! Joining me today are 2 people that had no faith in Charlotte, the All-American American, Russ, and a lady among assholes, Keri. We will be doing this 9 Deuce Style because I lack originality.  I must note that I watched Hell In A Cell in a little more than an hour, so my analysis is very lacking.   Happy Halloween.

  1.  6 Man Cruiserweight Match – Cedric Alexander, Lince Dorado & Sin Cara def. Tony Nese, Drew Gulak & Ariya Daivari

Russ:  I didn’t watch it.  I’ll have to go back and take a gander at it as I heard it was decent.  Until then I can’t really comment on it.

Keri:  This was a decent match with decent spots. All in all it appeared to be another cruiserweight division preview match. Rich Swann in the pre-show interview was also entertaining. I’m starting to like this guy.

Kent:  Yeah, Cedric won! Wooo.  I didn’t watch anything aside from the last 20 seconds. Great match! I like Cedric a lot honestly, so I look forward to him and Rich Swan elevating the division now that the Dabber has lost his belt.

  1.  US Championship Match – Roman Reigns def. Rusev

Russ:  The match was very physical, which is to be expected of these two.  It wasn’t a bad cell match, but it barely gave us a reason that it had to be in a cell.  Roman needs to work on selling injuries more cause some of it was laughable.  The Kendo Stick to the chest… the accolade on the steps with a chain! If a regular accolade is supposed to be tourture then how the hell did Roman get out of that?  I was partially Kentertained so good for them.  

Rating:  5.9  

Keri:  I’ll be honest I was drifting in and out of consciousness during this match. But for the parts I saw I was impressed. This was a good match. The ending not so much but oh well. Good job guys. Rating: 6 out of 9.2

Kent: OK, I have an issue with this match in particular as I watched a good chunk of it.  WWE needs to really figure out if submissions win matches or are just going to be set up moves. I say this because I am sick and tired of wrestlers who win matches with submissions, have their finisher rendered useless in a match of this magnitude. If everybody was losing to Rusev with the Accolade, then it is beyond fucking retarded that Roman survived it twice, with the second time involving being on the steps and a chain wrapped around his face. THAT is some of the shittiest booking that WWE does, and this happens far more often than it should. I have no issue with Roman winning, I have an issue with Roman powering out of that second Accolade because it neutered the shit out of that move. SHAME!

  1.  Bayley def. Dana Brook

Russ:  This was bad.  I feel bad for Bayley.  Dana needs to get her shit together, cause I see where she can be really good, but tonight was not her night.  Right person went over at least.  Now end this immediately so Bayley can move on and forget this ever happened.  

Rating. 2.9  the reverse duece! Should be our equivalent of terrible.  

Keri:  Yea! I got to see Bayley and see her win! Dana, you’re awful. Go back to NXT, please.  That is all. Rating: 3 out of 9.2

Kent:  This got like 7 or 8 minutes, zero fucks were given after Bayley entered, and I hate to be that dick, but Dana is gaining weight, and it’s not looking good on her. I don’t mind big booty bitches, just saying, in WWE, you tend to have to look a certain way to be relevant, which is their decision and my concern is that I would like to see Dana go on to great success. Compare her when she was in the competitions to now, and yikes. I hope she gets back on track because once you are on the main roster, you tend to put on 10 pounds, unless you are Rusev. I think he has lost some.

  1.  Gallows and Anderson def. Enzo and Cass

Russ:  I was entertained by Enzo and Cass so that is worth something.  This was a short match, but the right duo went over.  If we are to take G&A seriously then they have to win matches like this.  I hope they continue on to maybe feud with another top tag …team… Who the hell can these guy legitimately feud with that aren’t New Day?  Do something with your Tag Division RAW!  Enzo and Cass’s humor was a touch sophomoric, but the crowd didn’t seem to mind.

Rating:  4.0 too short to really get a good match going.  

Keri:  Great promo work as always by Enzo and Cass. However, I feel like this time it was a little too much and distracted everyone from a match that was far too short. At least Anderson and Gallows finally got a much needed win. Rating: 4 out of 9.2

Kent:  Just when I thought it was laughable to put on an eight minute match, we get a 6 minute tag match because Enzo wanted to talk, which is fine, but it’s not really fair to their opponents, especially on nights when they aren’t funny at all, like tonight. Glad that G&A finally won.

  1.  Red Belt Match – Kevin Owens def. Seth Rollins

Russ:  The match itself was fun.  Great sequences, and the spots all hit the right note.  Especially that powerbomb through the tables!  Both performers gave us a good match so we can’t complain about that.  I even like that Jericho locked himself in with the key so they “couldn’t” get back in.  Little details like that worked well.  Unfortunately, the match never elevated to great status.  Maybe, it was because of the forgone conclusion.  We knew that Owen’s wasn’t losing the belt and we also knew that Jericho would come along at some point.  I guess they are going to save the friends turn for after Survivor Series which is fine.  I’m not sure where Rollins goes from here.  He has already defeated Jericho twice on RAW recently, so feuding with him seems dumb.  There is nothing new to the HHH vs Rollins yet so we can’t even get that going yet.  

Rating: 6.9 (Kent: Russ, your fanboy card is showing. You’re drunk. Go Home. You cannot possibly think that this deserves a 6.9. That tells me that you want to not only re-watch it, but re-watch it with 24 hours of it being shown. Your scale is broken. Go find a designated driver, you lush, and go buy a new scale.)

Keri:  Good match and good use of Jericho. With that being said, it is the level of Jericho that is starting to bother me. KO really doesn’t need Jericho to win a title or act as a mouthpiece for him. KO can do this all on his own. Therefore, I think I will use this opportunity to caution Creative that I’m starting to get slightly bored with the KO and Jericho connection.  Rating: 7 out of 9.2.

Kent:  Uhmmm, who thought that this was fair to leave Jericho in there? Here’s a news flash, Kevin Owens is having one of the all time shittiest runs as a champ at the moment because Rollins is getting pushed harder than he is, as is Roman, Brock, and Goldberg. Hell, Jericho is possibly getting booked better.  KO needs to get as far away from Seth as humanly possible because his stock is crumbling in my eyes. He was doing way better against Cena or Zayn.

  1.  Cruiserweight Championship Match – THE Brian Kendrick def. TJ Perkins

Russ:  Another short match.  For these two the match was mediocre.  They have both put on way better performances.  This one didn’t have that many high flying spots or entertaining sequences that you come to expect with Cruisers.  The story they told was good though and that has to count for something.  Loved how Kendrick played on TJP’s feelings at the end.  He definitely won by hook or by crook! (get it! Cause you know he has the Captain’s Hook as a finisher…)

Rating: 5.3

Keri:  Decent match with decent spots. Are you all seeing a pattern here with the Cruiserweights and my comments? This could have been better especially given the fact that we have see better from both guys before last night. With that being said though, it was nice to see The Brian Kendrick pick up the victory here. I can’t wait to see how his run turns out.  Rating: 5 out of 9.2.

Kent:  Well, this match was also short, but it told a great story, and as I was the first one to suggest that THE Brian Kendrick was taking it off of TJ, despite hearing “But Kent, it’s too soon to take the belt off of him” and “TJ Perkins is my new favorite wrestler” and “TJ Perkins is my man crush of the week” and “I”m Russell and I like to dab”, I was there stating that Kendrick would win. Ballin! (Russ: While I occasionally dabble in dabbing and TJP is pretty awesome and man-crushy.  I did call for THE Brian Kendrick to win!)  

  1.  Tag Team Championship Match – Sheasaro def. New Day via DQ

Russ:  I was hoping that this would end a bit differently so we could finally conclude Sheamus vs. Cesaro in December.  We still might, but it didn’t go the way I thought.  Maybe they need these two for the Survivor Series Tag match.  Think about it RAW has diddly squat for a tag division so it makes sense to keep them as a tag through SS.  Still I was hoping that we could see them start to fall apart and really go at each other.  Oh well, liked the finish anyway, because I didn’t see it ending like that.  

Rating:  4.6

Keri:  Decent match with a slightly creative outcome. I like the way that they kept both teams looking strong with this ending. However, I have a feeling this feud may be over though. At least I hope it is because it is kinda yawn inducing. Rating: 4 out of 9.2

Kent:  Blind people saw this coming. I did like the creative ending at the very least. This was a night of creative finishes. So I won’t totally shit on RAW’s creative, not yet.

  1.  Women’s Championship Match – Charlotte def. Sasha Banks

Russ:  Well way to fuck things up WWE.  To start with: This was a really good match! Both women deserve credit and nothing should be taken away from them!  Told a nice story throughout and the spots seemed well done!  Having Charlotte win??? What the unholy hell is WWE thinking?  They are disgracing this belt having it switch hands so many times in a short period of time (or as Kent called it whoring)  With such a “historical” match (I heard that somewhere) you need to finish on a high note!  Sasha persevering and winning would have been the right call.  Crowd would have been over the moon and the celebration afterwards would have been fantastic.  Instead they swerve us with the wrong swerve!  I’m not Kent I don’t hate Boston because of it’s horrible sports teams.  So I took no pleasure in seeing them angry as shit with the outcome.  All it did for me was take what was possibly a great match and made it feel flat.  I’m not against Charlotte being champion!  Hell since she won it back at Summer Slam I’ve been high on her.  Her heeling has been top notch.  However,  what was the point of putting the belt on Sasha two weeks ago to have her lose it again?  I hope they turn her heel soon because I’m losing interest in her.  Seriously bad move WWE.  

Rating: 7.1  Best match of the night so I guess it was the right call for Main Event, but did the other matches suffer because they had to make this match the best?  

Keri:  I have a couple of comments about this one. First off, this was the match that the women needed to have in order to legitimize their equality with the guys on the roster when it comes to gimmick matches, like HIAC. And, well, both ladies delivered and then some. This was match of the night, based on my recap reading and finding the match on the youtubes. Great job for both ladies! With that being said though, I feel that the ending took away from the overall presentation of the match. Creative is playing hot potato with this belt and its getting annoying. This belt has not been in play for that long (6 months)and we have already had a 3 time women’s champion. Given the emphasis that they are placing on this division, this just seems sloppy to me.  Rating 7.5 out of 9.2 (with one point off for Creative playing belt hot potato)

Kent:  I got some quotes for you.

“Winner: Sasha, they probably won’t make a big deal out of the win either.” – Russ

“I pick Sasha to retain. Because there is no way Creative can botch another segment (or match) “ – Keri

“Charlotte wins because it’s in Boston and it would be hilarious to piss off those assholes that live in Taxachusettes. Fuck you Boston!” – Kent

And damn it feels good to be a gangsta. This is WWE at it’s finest. Every time they seem like they want to make Sasha seem important, they give her the belt and a month later, have Charlotte, the 3 time Women’s champion, beat her. Christ, 3 times already. That belt has been whored around more than a drunk skank at a Halloween party. This is how you do a revolution, right? Lita was crying. HAHAHA. You fucking people thinking that this is elevating anything. You are delusional.  The match was very good for women. Was it the best match, and main event worthy? Hahaha, hell no, bitch please, you must have a mental disease, assume the position and get back down on your knees. Gloating aside, I liked the ending and how it sucked the air out of that shitty arena full of shitty people. Choke on that Slapnuts!

  1.  Best performer of the night?

Russ:  The Brian Kendrick.  Great mental game he played throughout the match.  For a split second I almost thought he actually did hurt his leg.  This was really hard for me, because nothing stood out as fantastic, but nothing major was out-right terrible (take out the Bayley vs. Dana match.)   

Keri:  The Brian Kendrick. Because everything else was predictable.

Kent:  Sasha’s shorts? (Russ: Especially in the final pin.  Should give that camerman a slammy for best placed shot!)  The cameraman who caught Sasha and Charlotte talking their way through the final minute? Normally I would say somebody like Rusev who had a very good match, or THE Brian Kendrick, but I will give the nod to RAW Creative. Think about it, we had some clever match finishes with Kendrick, Sheasaro, and the main event that killed the crowd. Eh fuck it, Sasha’s shorts.

Bonus Deuce

  1.   Best Match of the Night?

Russ:  The women’s main event.  I echo Kent’s statement on this.  It kind of felt like the other two HIAC matches had to not go overboard so that the women’s match could be spectacular.  Don’t get me wrong all three matches were good, but it felt like nothing could be amazing because the last match had to be the bomb diggity.  Overall Score: 5.2 (Kent: I went to Urban Dictionary to see the meaning of Bomb Diggity. Not because I didn’t know, but more because I wanted to see it in writing. Worth it.)

Keri:  The women’s main event. Why? Well, as my counterparts have pointed out, the PPV was booked that way. Think about this question for a second, will you? Let’s say creative put together solid booking for all the matches on last night’s card. Would we still have the same opinion about this match?  Perhaps yes or perhaps no.  (Kent: Definitely no. This isn’t the first time that WWE has forsaken great matches just to make one stand out above and beyond all others.)

Kent:  The women’s main event. Seriously, they fucked over some of the other matches to intentionally put this one on a pedestal.  They booked it that way in a manipulative manner. Roman and Rusev was also a very good match for both guys.

  1.  Worst Match of the Night?

Russ:  Not even close… Bayley vs. Dana.  Dana’s offense was awful.  I know we have to tolerate a few goofy things in wrestling, but this was embarrassing.  

Keri:  Oh look. I’m in agreement with Russ here (surprised anyone? I didn’t think so). Bayley vs. Dana was the worst match of the night. I have two observations about this match. First, this match was booked for one reason and one reason only, to get Bayley on the card. WWE knows what they have with Bayley and they know what it means if she is not on the card. Why the match had to be against Dana though? I have no clue so don’t ask me. Second, Bayley proved last night beyond a shadow of a doubt that Dana was brought up too soon. I seriously believe that Bayley carried Dana the entire match. Creative, Dana, in her current state, is not main roster material. She is not ready and last night proved it. Bring her back down to NXT before you embarrass the poor girl even more than she already has been.

Kent:  Seth vs KO for me. This was the perfect RAW match. It has been done to death and I couldn’t wait for it to be over despite fast forwarding 15 minutes of it. There was very little entertainment value to this one. I hate the handicap idea as nobody on the roster should be able to beat the top 2 heels. When you make things too obvious, don’t be upset at the fans for not giving a fuck. That’s all.

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WWE Hell In A Cell 2016 Preview 9 Deuce – The First Time Ever Edition

WWE Hell In A Cell 2016 Preview

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Welcome to a preview for WWE’s 2016 Hell In A Cell PPV. I am joined by the immaculate Keri, and the effervescent Russ. 2 new words!!!  The WWE has done a brilliant job building up this PPV with a whopping 6 matches!!! Wow, that’s just incredible, not Justin Credible. With this overabundance of quality, it will be super easy to do this blog!

 

The 9

  1. Enzo and Cass vs. Gallows and Anderson

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Russ:  I would say that this should be a win for G&A.  They need a credible win to give them a nice push to make them a credible (this word is getting thrown around a lot in this blog) threat to the New Day.  I think G&A should eventually take the titles off New Day (after they break the record of course.) Then Enzo and Cass can get the win back at WM.

Winner: G&A

Keri:  At some point, the burial of Gallows and Anderson has to end. Right? Right? Creative why aren’t you answering me? Ok. Fine. Please make me a happy fan and give Anderson and Gallows the win at HIAC. Pleeeeeeease. By the way, I hate being forced to beg for anything so please honor this little request.

Kent:  With 4 plus months, Enzo and Cass can afford to eat the loss here, but I am very uncertain about this one.  This is the match that I am least certain about the outcome.

 

  1. TJ Perkins vs THE Brian Kendrick for the Cruiserweight championship

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Russ:  I am of two minds on this match and I’m not sure which way WWE is going to take it.  On the one hand TJP really should keep the belt and get it legitimized as a belt worth fighting for.  On the other hand THE Brian Kendrick is awesome and should be the one to elevate the belt only to maybe drop it at WM to TJP.  I think as I wrote this I convinces myself of the latter option so….

Winner: THE Brian Kendrick in some asshole heel way to gain sympathy for our boy TJP!

Keri:  I’m going to make this one short and sweet. And your NEW Cruiserweight champion and all around good family man, The Brian Kendrick. See told you it would be short and sweet.

Kent:  I got THE Brian Kendrick winning this one as I have been saying. This is the title most likely to switch hands, and Brian jobbed on RAW and has a storyline. TJ dabs. Fuck TJ. All hail your NEW Cruiserweight Champion, the former pirate, THE Brian Kendrick.

 

  1. New Day vs Sheasaro for the Tag Team Championship

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Russ:  Well since Sheasaro won on RAW and the rule of thumb is the winner of RAW tends to be the loser at the PPV I’ll go with New Day.  Not to mention New Day is going to get that record now so it makes sense that they retain.  I hope this leads to Sheamus and Cesaro going back to hating each other and we get one final match at the December PPV that culminates in a ladder match between them and the winner gets a great spot in the Royal Rumble say (#27) … COME ON FANTASY BOOKING!

Winner: New Day

Keri:  Yawn. New Day. Why? Because breaking records, as we learned with the former Divas division and a certain Bella, are more important than not boring us to death with the same old crap.

Kent:  New Day wins because they just had this match on RAW, and I don’t have the patience to type up how mad that makes me. Demolition’s record is going down thanks to both being involved in the lawsuit.

 

  1. Roman Reigns vs. Rusev for the US Championship

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Russ:  Time to move Rusev into the Main Event scene.  Rusev is a real talent that seems to get boned hard when he doesn’t have the US title to hold onto.  That is a shame really, but let’s see what he can do in the Main Event.  So in order for him to move on he has to lose.

Winner: This is for Keri  #LOLROMANREIGNSWINS

Keri:  Ok. I’m going to go back to pleading with creative. Please let this be the end of this feud. Pretty, pretty please. I’m so sick of watching these two wrestle that the only redeeming value for this match (and feud) is Lana. Therefore, I say let’s end this thing with Roman retaining and move Rusev onto bigger and better things.  Bigger and Better things like say Braun?

Kent:  The WWE needs to see what Rusev can do in a feud that doesn’t revolve around the US title. They fucked him over the last time, but now there Is more urgency to have a good #2 heel. Roman Reigns supreme.

 

  1. Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins for the Red Belt

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Russ:  This is the most obvious of obvious outcomes.  Seth Rollins wins! No, just kidding it would make little sense to have him win here.  Jericho has something to do with this match and I’m sure it will have something to do with how Kevin retains the title, but what that is I have no clue.

Winner: Not my boy!  KO

Keri:  Is it wrong that I completely didn’t know that this match was a thing? I seriously though it was KO and Jericho for the belt or something to do with Rollins and Jericho given the build this match. Well, I guess I was wrong. I say KO retains because this “feud” is yawn inducing. Also, KO needs to move onto a Jericho feud because RAW has to keep my interest somehow. If not, I’m throwing all my support to Smackdown and spending Monday nights catching up on Netflix. (Kent: That’s how I spend my Monday nights, or gaming.)

Kent:  Kevin Owens. I don’t know what Jericho is going to do, but I am glad that he has the list back.

 

  1. For the FIRST TIME EVER: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte in a HELL IN A CELL!!!!

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Russ:  I wasn’t aware of this, but this is apparently a historical event.  WWE shame on you for not making a bigger deal out of the fact that this is the first time it has ever happened.  I mean seriously I would have never known that this was a historical event that was happening at HIAC.  They could have promoted this to get viewers to watch… Alright, I’m done being an asshole … for now.  (Kent: No, please, continue. WWE deserves it.)

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Winner: Sasha, they probably won’t make a big deal out of the win either.

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Keri:  Ok. So let me remind everyone that this is a historic match and we are seeing this for the first time ever. Oh, you hadn’t heard that yet. Sorry for the surprise. I’ll wait while you all get over the shock and awe of this earth shattering news. Ok. Is everyone ready for my pick? Ok good. I pick Sasha to retain. Because there is no way Creative can botch another segment (or match) trying to bury a hometown guy (or in this case gal) in less than a week, can they? Nevermind, I forgot who I was talking about. Carry on everyone. Nothing to see here.

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Kent:  Charlotte wins because it’s in Boston and it would be hilarious to piss off those assholes that live in Taxachusettes. Fuck you Boston!

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There WWE, I did the work for you to make sure people are aware of this match.

  1. What match opens the show?

Russ:  Sasha vs Charlotte – Yea a big Fuck you to the fans.  Also, WWE can justify the spot because AJ vs Dean vs Cena was the Main Event at No Mercy and it was the first match to air. (Kent: So that is the real reason that Dean/AJ/Cena went first so WWE could site precedence that they have had a main event go on first so that this won’t minimize whatever match starts this PPV. Honestly, that’s pretty fucking smart.)

Keri:  Enzo and Cass or Bayley and Dana because well reasons.

Kent:  Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins, Russ has convinced me.

 

  1. What match closes the show?

Russ:  Rollins Vs KO – it isn’t the spot it deserves … it’s the spot it needs!

Keri:  The groundbreaking, first time ever, historical women’s HIAC match. And I don’t want to hear that you didn’t know that this match was historical because I just told you in an earlier question. Please try to keep up.

Kent:  The women, and I’ll be watching Walking and Talking Dead and actually be entertained. Fucking PC pussies. Ghostbusters 2016 says hi.

 

  1. If you could add a match to the PPV, what one would you add?

Russ:  Braun and Zayn.  This would be a great way to heat up their rivalry.  Honestly, have Zayn look like he could get the win and have Braun straight up cheat to win!  This would give us a legit feud between the two and finally give us something interesting to work with in Braun and Zayn probably wouldn’t get hurt by the eventual real loss he’ll take when these two end the feud.

Keri:  Can we get the return of Emma already and have her wrestle Summer or Alicia? That way we can see there is more to this division than just 4 women. What am I saying? The existing card is what we are getting on Sunday, folks. Can I ask for half (or at least a quarter) of my husband’s $9.99 back now, please?

Kent:  Assuming that Braun and Sami are having an interaction, I won’t count them. Then that leaves….hmm, the tag division is bare, uhmm, the singles division is fairly bare…..uhhhhh, nobody cares about any of the other divas. Well shit. I would let Rich Swann and Cedric Alexander put on a 20 minute classic that outshine every match on the card, and also Summer Rae vs Alicia for 20 uninterrupted, no WWE network commercials, match. But please, advertise for a network that we are already paying to see. Assholes!

 

Bonus Deuce

  1. In your opinion, is the Undertaker vs. Mick Foley Hell in a Cell the most well-known wrestling match of all time?

Russ:  I don’t know about the most well-known, but it certainly is one of the greatest.  That is the match that truly solidified my fandom of wrestling. The reason most people recall it is simply because of how brutal it was!  Both men put in a huge effort and it paid off.  It was the first time somebody fell off the top of the cell and it then fell through it! Incredible (there it is again) just thinking of it now so many years later.

Keri:  It’s the only one I’ve heard of and have seen recapped ad nauseum. So my answer is Yes.

Kent:  You have a handful of matches that I can think of, so I am going to list them, and I apologize if I am missing any, but fuck you. Hogan vs. Andre, Hogan vs. Savage, Hogan vs. Warrior, Austin vs HBK with Mike Tyson, Bret vs. Shawn Screwjob, Austin vs Rock Mania 17, Hogan vs. Goldberg, Sting vs. Hogan, and Taker vs. Mankind.  Taker vs. Mankind is still my answer, but I could make an argument for Hogan vs. Andre and the Screwjob above the rest of them. Taker and Mankind happened when WWF was clawing their way back and it’s one of those moments that have been shown for 20 years almost. Every time there is a HIAC match, that match is referenced, so it has been engrained in fan’s minds for a long time. Fans from the bygone era would say Andre vs Hogan as that was monumental. I feel the screwjob is one of those pop culture matches that is known because of the story, but I don’t think it is as big as either.

 

  1. Aside from the aforementioned Undertaker vs. Mankind match, what is your favorite Hell in a Cell match?

Russ:  Well, the other most memorable one for me was Taker vs Bossman.  Not that the match was any good, I don’t remember any of it, but the end was fantastic!  Bossman getting lynched by the brood!  As for another favorite I’d have to go with HHH vs HBK.  I just remember all of the great spots they had in it and the story leading up to it was fantastic.

Keri:  I haven’t seen many HIAC matches other than Taker and Mankind highlights so I don’t really have a favorite. Well, I guess now I know what my homework is for the weekend. I shall do it instead of watching HIAC on Sunday and will provide a full report on next week’s, Are You Not Kentertained? Podcast (now available on iTunes).

Kent:  Tough one as I wanted to say HHH vs. HBK, as that match was brilliant, but Taker vs. HBK in the very first one was pretty epic. Taker vs. Brock deserves a mention as well. Honorable mention that only Russ and Eric will find funny, Taker vs. Bossman when Bossman got lynched by the Brood.  Final answer answer, Taker vs HBK as it had a great storyline during Shawn’s best run as champ, and this was Kane’s debut. There are a lot of things to love here.

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