I am back to give you the expert opinion on everything that went down at NXT’s Takeover Houston 2017. If you are looking for the typical internet wrestling fan’s perspective, pull your pants down and go fuck yourself. Just because somebody is the flavor of the week doesn’t necessarily mean that I am going to latch on to them. I don’t have a neckbeard, and I don’t apologize, mainly because I can’t grow hair.
Lars Sullivan defeated Kassius Ohno
Did this match go exactly as you imagined it would? Good, you’ve been paying attention then because this is what anybody who knows wrestling would predict. It was fun and I did suggest that it would be. Kassius knows how to perform, and Lars is still learning, but it’s fun to watch him develop. I was also right in suggesting that this would be the worst match of the night. It happens, but I had fun.
Aleister Black defeated Velveteen Dream
This may have been the most fun and entertaining match of the night. I had so much fun. I loved all of the psychology that they deployed in this match that was built from the feud itself. It was logical. It’s what pro wrestling should be. I loved that Aleister went for wrestling early rather than his usual strikes. The theme of this match was in the sequences rather than being spot monkeys, which we will get to later in the night. This is the type of match that I yearn for as a fan and I absolutely want to see this feud continue. Aleister on the mic after the match was a nice touch. I’m going to say that this match will be better than any match on Survivor Series.
NXT Women’s Fatal 4 Way Championship match
Ember Moon defeated Nikki Cross, Peyton Royce, and Kairi Sain
This match let me down. I have many reasons. First, let’s talk about the positives. Ember Moon is a star and looked the part. She is the most deserving of the 4 women in my opinion based on what we have seen. Peyton looked great so I enjoyed that. When Nikki got her brief blip of offense, she looked like the girl that I love. I liked Regal and Asuka giving her the belt. Now for the negatives. Peyton did that great submission but could clearly see Ember coming, yet never relinquished the hold. That made zero sense. Nikki barely got any offense in and was there to bump. The stupidity of people just staring and waiting for somebody to do a suicide dive onto them. You gotta pretend like you’re fighting or busy, otherwise it just looks fucking terrible, like it did. But most of all, and I cannot stress this enough, Kairi Sane is not very good. She is the female Finn Balor. She has a gimmick that attracts the masses and has a bit of charisma and is attractive. Seriously, that describes Finn as well. Neither are great in ring but are hyped as great. Why does the IWC instantly give everybody from Japan a pass? Being in Japanese wrestling isn’t a guarantee that you are good in the ring. Her gimmick is tasteless in my opinion, and fucking stupid, gag worthy. Her only redeemable quality is her looks, at least from what I’ve seen so far. Her repeated strikes look fucking terrible and her finisher is a top rope elbow. Why are the announcers acting like it is breathtaking? Seriously, why is that move considered spectacular? Anybody? Exactly. Fucking IWC has to ruin shit. I talked with Eric earlier Saturday about her and he gave me an apt explanation of why she does nothing for me. He’s not wrong in reasons I would dislike her. He did fail to mention how bad she is in ring though and that’s the biggest sin. Hopefully she does porn down the road because that will most likely be the only time I give a fuck.
Rating: 3.5 Mainly for Ember being awesome, but the finish was also dumb as hell, just 2 women standing there waiting. How fucking silly.
NXT Men’s Championship Match
Andrade Cien Almas defeated Drew McIntyre and won the belt
Well, in the preview I said that Andrade was here to get Drew over even more. Boy was I wrong in that regard. On the plus side, for over a year, I have been singing the praises of Andrade, and anybody who has read my NXT stuff knows that I have long admired his work and hoped that he would get moved up. Well, this is even better! Both guys are main roster ready and I fully expect Drew on the main roster for the Royal Rumble. I would love to see him and Baron have a match. This match was way better than I thought it would be and I had hopes of this being match of the night. I really thought that this was well done, and that fucking spike DDT finish was scary looking and awesome. I know that the IWC losers of the world will try to hype up how good War Games was. No, this is a Match of the Year candidate right here. The psychology, the moves, the drama, it all worked and both guys worked their asses off. I will be rewatching this match again this week.
Undisputed ERA defeated Sanity and Roddy & Authors of Pain
Well, if you like a match that is nothing but going spot to spot to spot and hitting the most cliche shit, well here you go. How many different variations do we need of the Tower of Doom in one night? The women had already done it. Let’s discuss the positives. Killian Dame hitting the Van Terminator, I will not call it bullshit coast to coast, was really great. Unfortunately, the cameraman painfully showed the O’Reilly I think it was, just looking and talking to the ref as the move got set up. Terrible camerawork WWE! Alexander Wolfe is a guy that I am very high on. He can do some great shit and I would love to see him and Luke someday. The super German suplex through 2 tables cut his head badly enough to take him out of the match for 5 or so minutes. I felt bad for him. The AoP continue to really impress me. I think that they are going to be huge stars for years. I thought Eric Young and Killian did some good stuff, I was impressed with Killian’s conditioning, and Eric does all of the little things right. Roddy doesn’t piss me off and I can growing to tolerate him, not like, but I don’t hate his matches as much. He tries. I came into this thinking that I like Bobby Fish, but he did nothing here in this match. I did see something in Kyle O’Reilly tonight that really impressed me. He has mannerisms and the way that he moves and acts, he’s a total package. He’s the best of the group. Speaking of the group, I don’t get the Adam Cole hype. The pecking order goes HBK > Dolph > Stevie Richards >>>>>>>>>> Adam Cole. He reminds me a lot of early to mid 90’s HBK, the HBK that was not very good, just had great conditioning and charisma. This guy is all flash and no substance. Jeff Hardy probably thinks that you are amazing. The Young Bucks and Kenny Omega probably think that this guy is brilliant. Yeah, he’s not. He’s not exciting in the least bit. I don’t even know what his moveset is, but it seems generic as fuck. This is why the IWC can all fuck themselves because they just cheer on what seems cool and new. This match was fun, and it kept my attention. I really didn’t care for the rules where both members of the team came into the match rather than rotating one guy at a time, which was the normal way as far as I can recall. This could have been better with some tweaks, but I did like it. Still, I won’t re-watch this anytime soon.
Rating: 5.7 The big guys made this match entertaining if we’re being honest.
This wasn’t the best NXT special, but it had 2 really good matches, plus a War Games. I’m positive that this was better than what Survivor Series will provide us as fans.
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