I am shocked that I have never sat down to watch this. Let’s see what we have.
It starts off with Count Dracula having a drink with Mamuwalde and his wife Luva. Dracula doesn’t want to end trading, talks some jive about Luva and how pretty she is, and Mamuwalde ain’t having that. So a fight ensues, and 3 guys take on Mamuwalde, and one eventually grabs a pot to bash over Mamu’s head, but it is such a bad stunt. Then Dracula has like 6 bitches all come for Luva, and they are all vampires, but that’s not the unbelievable part. No, the fact that a black woman just stood there and allowed these undead white bitches to come at her and she didn’t fight back is unbelievable to me. Dracula bites Mamuwalde’s neck and he placed a curse on him, which….no shit. “You shall be …. Blacula!” This is pretty messed up. Dracula locks Blacula in a coffin and is going to make Luva watch and listen until she dies. That’s pretty badass.
So this film is the 70’s through and through, and that has it’s pros and potential cons. If you’re precious snowflake that can’t handle offensive words, this isn’t for you. This film would absolutely shatter you. N bombs are launched with ease as are the F words, and no I do not mean fuck. This is actually at it’s core, a love story. Yeah, it’s true. Mamuwalde finds a girl named Tina who looks identical to Luva, and they are played by the same actress. Hollywood magic!! The death scenes were 70’s level schlock, not bad, not good. I really hated the screaming. Like bitches, tone that shit down!!! I had to lower the volume due to the shrillness of it. And I know, gotta have a scream queen, but there ie s a line in the sand you don’t need to cross.
The story is good, and longtime horror fans can surmise how it will end, but it may surprise some of you, in a good way. Overall, this is one of those films that you have heard referenced in the past. I suspect that a lot of my readers haven’t seen it, and that is a shame. I do believe it is on Starz, and you can get like a week trial if interested, or you know, hop on Amazon and order it. I liked it. It is something I would watch again. The 2 male leads were very good. Skillet was probably my favorite character. I also loved the female taxi driver. She was funny as hell. I would say that there is more to like than to not like. I should point out that there is a Dr. Gordon in this film, and fans of Saw may appreciate that.
William Marshall was awesome and had great facial hair. Seriously though, look at this man!
Rating: 5.7 – I had a good time, I would watch again, but I wasn’t in love with it. Worth it though.
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