I know that I wrote a review about this when the film came out. I saw it in the theater. But I lost many of my reviews over the years. Technical difficulties happen, right? I have only seen this once. I walked away quite disappointed. 6 years later, I think it is time to see if I like it any better. I no longer have high expectations. I am also a fan of Stephen Lang from his role in VFW. Maybe this will be more fun.
One major problem exists. The same person who wrote and directed the Evil Dead reboot also did this film. Fede Alvarez is his name, and I am not a fan of the atrocity that was Evil Dead (2013). How do you go from one of the best horror franchises and then do something so utterly generic? I know that this person has feelings, but damn that movie sucked. In all fairness, as with all of my criticisms, I can’t responsibly pin all the blame on the director when I have no idea if there was any studio interference or things of that nature. But the finished product still sucked.
Start Film
We have 4 major characters. 16 minutes in, here’s what we know. Alex’s father works for a home security company and has access to info and keys to homes. Rocky is the lead female. She comes from an abusive home with an alcoholic mom, an abandoned father, and her younger sister, Diddy. The mom is a real piece of work. Then there is Money, who is Rocky’s boyfriend. He is utterly useless. He’s bigger than Alex and has the girl but adds very little value to the group. He meets with their fence to sell all the things that they steal. Alex is very by the rules with how much they steal so as not to increase their sentence if they were to get caught. They never steal money, only items to sell. The goal is to get enough money and move out of Detroit and go to California and start a new life.
Money finds out about a blind ex-vet who won a cash settlement when a wealthy girl hit his daughter and killed her. he supposedly has 300K from the settlement. Naturally, they think that this is gonna be easy. The only obstacle is the rottweiler that the blind guy has. I am probably just gonna refer to him as Lang since he’s played by Stephen Lang. Just easier for me.
Here, you can make your own moral choices. Is it incredibly messed up to try to steal from a blind ex-vet? Yeah. Is it wrong to want to get the hell out of some of these poor, or worse scenarios? No, although Alex only seems to be interested because he has a thing for Rocky. Not smart. So Alex should be out. Money makes sense because he doesn’t strike me as a guy that is destined for much. Rocky makes the most sense, mainly because they gave her all the damn backstory. That is one way that this film fails us, big time. We’re already told from the beginning, the 2 guys are just there to take the hits and probably die so the girl can survive. A final girl should make sense and not be presented so obviously. This film would be much better if they gave Alex and Money better motivations early on in hopes of you potentially getting behind them. Let’s never forget why the reboot of Evil Dead sucked. Well, here we are, 16 minutes into the movie.
They sedate the dog and can’t get in the front, so time to use a side entrance. Clearly, they’ve never seen People Under The Stairs. The side door also is a no-go. So is the cellar entrance. But there’s a window with no bars. Now, she is breaking a window to unlatch it. The guy is blind, so his hearing is great. And she is tracking glass through the house. And the alarm countdown has been triggered. You just bail. You come back with a better plan until everything goes according to plan, if you’re gonna do this. I still don’t like this idea.
Money tells Alex to stay in the friend zone. She lets them in. Shoes off. Well then, you shouldn’t have left the glass on the floor, dummy. So that will come back to hurt someone sooner than later, obviously. I just ate a bag of popcorn. It was better than this film, so far.
There’s a home video playing on TV, presumably of Lang’s daughter. Hmmm, Lang’s character’s name is Norman Nordstrom, so I can now call him Norman, or Norm. Even better. Money tries to set off a bottle of sleeping gas or something like that, and it wakes up Norm, but Money stays still until Norm turns off the TV and lays back down. the gas is released and Money gets loud almost immediately after. So stupid. He can die first.
Rocky finds a door with a big lock, and Money tries with his crowbar. Yeah, you ain’t that strong, homey. So he takes out his 9mm Baretta. Alex is worried that this now gives Norm the legal right to shoot them. Alex tells Rocky to leave, Money mocks him. He shoots the lock off and Alex takes off. Norm enters the room asking who is there. Money tells him that he was wasted and wandered in. Norm steps on the lock that was shot off. Money talks tough. Rocky, are you regretting not leaving? Money gives a warning shot and calls him a pussy. norm grabs the gun, Rocky yelps, and Alex is concerned. Just trying to turn my mind off.
Norm now has Money by the throat and has the gun pointed at him. He asks how many of them are there, but Norm knows that it’s a lie. He definitely heard the yelp. He puts a bullet in Money’s bubblegoose. Okay, you reeled me back in. Rocky, you could have grabbed the crowbar you could have bailed when Alex left, when the gun was fired, but instead, you choose to hide like a simpleton. Alex makes his way back in. Norman passes him and picks up the shard of glass, I think. Norm has now locked the entrance that Alex came in through. Alex cannot seem to get away, and Norm is boarding up the initial entrance window. Rocky is on her phone. typical female. HA! She tells Alex that Money has been shot.
In the closet, Rocky sees the safe that they were looking for as Norman accessed it, and she now has the code. So that begs the question, what was in the locked area? Alex finds Rocky. They start whispering. How dumb are you? Wait, she then opens the safe with a bunch of beeping. I reiterate, he is blind and his hearing is probably spot on. Alex suggests that was closer to a million instead of 300K. Also, they think the locked door will lead to the cellar. Just then, Norm comes from that door and is a foot away from her. I also have to ask, even if Norm doesn’t hear them, when he is close to them, would he smell them? It’s 2016, everyone is using stronger scented soaps.
Norm drags Money’s body, and Alex backs up, and the floor creaks. Norm is aiming his gun around the room. Norm then just takes a shot at the cell phone vibrating. Down in the basement, we go, climbing down a ladder. Am I wrong in suggesting that Norm would probably have bells attached to all of his doors since he’s living alone in Detroit? Norm finally smells something. Oh, he has found multiple pairs of shoes. “Hmm” indeed.
He checks the safe, it’s empty. Norm is about to become unhinged. Rocky and Alex are taking their sweet time. And they can’t find the door. But they found a girl tied up in the basement that sets off a bell alarm. She is in a well-padded pillow fort. The girl is attached via a harness and tape over her mouth. You know who she is. Alex found the door. The girl shows Rocky a newspaper clipping saying that she, Cindy, was cleared of manslaughter in the killing of Norm’s daughter. If you didn’t guess that it was here, go back to Disney +. There are plenty of quality shows on there. They hear Norm walking quickly. He is in good shape. He definitely hits the gym twice a day. There is a safe down there, and it has keys to free Cindy. But she has no leg strength. There’s the door, but there’s also a padlock. Of course, there is.
They open the door, Norm shoots Alex in the ear, shoots Cindy, and Rocky yelps again. Cindy got shot in the face and she is dead. Alex and Rocky run and Norm is shooting. Rocky, are you really worried about Cindy at this moment? Norm is very upset that he shot Cindy.
Norm has now really locked the basement. Alex and Rocky need to get upstairs. Norm turns out the lights. John Doe has the upper hand. Can’t wait for the inevitable cheap jump scare. She is so close to Norm, then Alex calls out to her. Norm grabs Alex, but he is out of bullets, unfortunately. In the struggle, Alex leverages himself and pushes the shelves onto Norm. They get back upstairs. They wedge the crowbar under the door.
But now the dog is awake. Alex tries reasoning with the dog. Norm pounds on the door and the dog is crazed. They go to the second floor now. They barricade themselves in a room with one window that has bars on them. Good decision. Alex wants to remotely set off the alarm figuring the police would be more interested in kidnapping and murder compared to robbery. “But then we wouldn’t get the money.” If anyone still had sympathy for Rocky after that line, I just don’t know what to tell you. Norm has a new gun and fired a shot into the room. There’s a vent in there. Norm is muscling his way in. Alex tries to maintain and Rocky crawls through the vent. Norm muscles in, and the dog comes in and tackles Alex sending him through the window and onto a glass ceiling. Wait, there was a window? Then why not use that? The dog is up in the vent. She takes a dive down. Alex wakes up. Norm shoots the glass, dropping Alex back into the house. There’s no easy way out, there’s no shortcut home.
Alex tries activating the alarm, to no avail. Norm shoots at him. Alex sees tools on the wall, including a hammer. Alex hits Norm in the hand, and then Norm gets some good shots in. Alex crawls for the gun, but Norm starts to choke him out. Alex grabs the gun, but he is tossed backward. He loses the gun and gets pummeled in the face. Norm finds hedge clippers and Alex doesn’t live no more.
Rocky wakes up. She’s never looked better. She gets to an outdoor vent, where all kinds of stuff could come crawling into. She kicks it out, but Norm is underneath and goes fishing. He brings her down, steals her bag, and stomps and beats her ass. He goes for a nice strangle until she passes out. I wonder where she will wake up.
Oh wow, she’s in the harness and will be his new pet. He probably should have cut out her tongue too. But maybe he wanted a chat. She wakes up and begs him to let her go. She claims to understand, but Norm says that rich girls don’t go to jail. Since Cindy took away his baby, he wanted her to give him a new one. Cindy was pregnant with his baby. Alright, now we’re going places. Norm’s voice is great. Norm, I think you need to get started on making a new baby.
Alex wakes up, the clippers went into Money’s body. Alex grabs the mallet, the dog chases and he locks the dog in a room. I have no idea what Norm just poured onto Cindy’s corpse. But she is underground now. He is raising Rocky up. He has something frozen and then talks about not being a rapist or ever forcing himself on her. You know what’s next. He promised to set Cindy free as soon as she gave him a child. He is done waiting. He grabs scissors and cuts her pants. Now grabs a turkey baster and dips it in his clue goo. She is kicking and screaming. In 9 months, he will give her her life back. Before he squeezes it in, Alex gets Norm from behind a couple of times and frees Rocky while handcuffing Norm. She beats the hell out of him and shoves the baster in his mouth.
Rocky wants to call the cops, but Alex says no. Either the money buys their silence or they are gonna get arrested. They decide to leave. It takes forever at the front door to get the key. Alex gets shot because Norm is free already. Rocky starts running out the door and down the street. She runs a few houses down and then turns around and mocks him, saying that he is useless out here. Did anyone else just get a Creepshow 2 vibe from that moment, from The Raft segment? The dog is now charging after her. If you still have sympathy for Rocky and are cheering her on…..we just shouldn’t ever really discuss movies. Just get the hell out of there. you won, kind of. But you can’t just ever accept the victory or the second chance.
The dog is the most sympathetic character in this film, and it’s not even close. She gets to the car, and the dog is right there, but she gets in. The passenger door window is open. Dog tries to get in, to no avail. One small problem. The backpack is right outside the car door and the dog is standing on the hood barking. And no keys.
She takes down the backseat, crawls in the trunk, grabs a leash or rope, and sets a trap for the dog to enter the trunk. It succeeds, but the dog is much stronger. She attaches the other end to the collar. Just barely surviving. She gets her bag, and Norm is there to grab her from behind and drag her back on the street in broad daylight. Yup, that happened. And now she is back in his living room.
She sees the remote control for the alarm and sets it off. Norm is freaking out. It is so loud and startling to him. She takes a swing on him a few times, but he has a gun. And she keeps getting away with it. Nonsense. The alarm stops, he reloads his gun, and she pummels him in the face with the crowbar and knocks him all the way down to the basement. Remember, no stairs, just a straight drop. Now you really need to leave. Nope, gonna stand there and breathe for a minute. There come the cops. She runs across the street, out of sight.
Then we have Rocky and Diddy ready to take a train. Rocky sees a news report on Norm. Norm sustained injuries and will return home soon, and nothing was reported stolen. Rocky and Diddy walk away, presumably to get on the train.
End Film
This has a 7.1 on IMDB. Did this feel like a 7 to you? Did you sit there and recommend this to your friends? I certainly didn’t.
I’m trying not to be overly negative. The ideas are all there. But this could have been an hour long and been far more compelling to me. Just cut a lot of stuff out. How did Norm have a million dollars? Why was Rocky so slow to escape every time the opportunity presented itself?
I know that we don’t always need a good guy and a bad guy. I love layers of great. I think that is perhaps the best aspect of this. Everyone here has some sympathetic traits, but also some questionable to awful traits. It’s not about who was more innocent. Strictly a game of cat and mouse. When you look at it through that lens, this isn’t too bad. I really would like to know if the dog got out okay.
I will tell you that I wish it was a fat guy instead of Rocky. Give us something different other than cliche girl. It’s soooooo played out. I am happy that she gets the opportunity to give Diddy a new and hopefully, much better life. Diddy probably is the only likable human in this film, and she gets 3-4 minutes of screen time.
I will say that the pacing was good, even if I would have preferred the run time to be cut a little. I also am not sold on him dragging her on the street in broad daylight. I’m sure there was a point to it, nobody in the neighborhood gives a damn, perhaps.
I think at least once a year, I make this plea. I dare someone in Hollywood to make a good lead male protagonist in a horror film in 2023. Not a child either. Like a grown man. Give us an antagonist perfectly capable of taking on a grown-ass man. Give me something like that, that would be compelling. Hell, you can flip the script and make the antagonist a female. Look how incredible Misery was.
I think both Jane Levy and Stephen Lang were fantastic given their roles.
Look, it’s a well-made movie that falls into cliches too often. That works when it is tongue-in-cheek. Here, it is hit and miss for me. It is mostly well done. I am torn between a high 5 and a low 6. A few things just rub me the wrong way, but the rest is quite good.
Final Rating: 6.0 – This is probably a 5.5 with a worse actor playing the role of Norman, but Stephen Lang was very good.
All the pictures used in this blog are for review purposes. They are the property of:
- Screen Gems
- Stage 6 Films
- Ghost House Pictures
- Blind Man Productions (copyright)
- Good Universe (uncredited)
- Pioneer Stilking Films
Please go find a copy and support the creators.