I have had this on my DVR for a month or so, let’s see what it is. Here is IMDB’s oh so brief summary: “Eight volunteers find themselves fighting for their lives when a drug trial goes horribly wrong.”
You know what? That’s really all I needed to hear. I LOVE movies like this. I’m pumped. And I have heartburn. I just realized, I haven’t taken my pills in 2 days. No Prilosec, no Welbutrin, no nothing. YIKES. And I’ve been pretty sane all things considering.
So there are 7 volunteers according to this opening screen, way to go IMDB. They are paid 2000 Euros to participate in a 2-week drug program. Yup, easy money, and you can possibly end up like Drew Barrymore in Firestarter, or Keith David in real life. The drug is called Pro 9.
This takes place at Limebrook Medical Center, and Showtime noted that there would be nudity. Thank you, sincerely all true fans of the genre. We have a guy who is driving and lost, he picks up a girl with a guitar. We have one mildly attractive chick getting changed into a gown. There is a creepy guy spying on her. I like him already. I hope he nails her. The mildly attractive girl has no internet connection. They can’t do anything strenuous or have sex. One dude asks about masturbation, and they kind of blow him off. I can only speak for myself, but 2 weeks……nope. That’s a long-ass time for a dude. Sorry that I just gave you that mental image ladies. There is a nice looking blonde chick. It appears 3 girls, 4 dudes.
So let’s establish character names. Jerome is the name of the dude who asked about masturbating. Adam is the guy who drove. Joni is guitar girl. Arif is a Middle Eastern-looking dude. Morty is the creepy dude who I like. I think Katie is the mildly attractive brunette. The blonde is named Carmen. We have Dr. Mansell. That leaves a female named Madeline, who I think is the nurse. Flame on.
Jerome is up first. He is flirty with this nurse. I think he will be the asshole. Arif is a very nervous dude, very private. Hey, Jerome just got undressed, and like FX, we just got some man ass. God, I hope that is the only nudity here…..assholes. Arif is annoying with his nervous mousy ways. Katie is like a reporter and she is here on assignment perhaps. The nurse is not bad looking. We have spent almost 20 minutes just getting rules and seeing them get their shots. Jerome is exercising, Morty warns him about it because it will increase heart rate and blood flow and possibly make the drugs effect more potent. Gosh, this heartburn is foolish.
The doctor says goodnight to the group as they are eating dinner. Morty has done this stuff before it sounds like. He explains that one of the testings he missed out on, for a pain killer, after a few days or a week, women were complaining of vaginal soreness. A few days later, no complaints, as he claims that the doctor raped all the women. I knew I liked this guy. Anyway, Katie finds this all very interesting.
The doctor pulls out of the driveway, and they were nice enough to tell us what time. Care to guess? You know I would only point it out for one time.
Yup, 9 Deuce representing!!!! WOOOO!!!
Arif is playing Xbox. He is just waggling this right thumbstick. I don’t know if he has ever played a video game before based on what I just witnessed. Total lack of realism here goddamnit. We also meet the night security guy. Joni walks to her bed, and some guy is creeping, lurking in the shadows. Lights go off and it is bedtime. Adam wakes up. He seems something happening with Jerome, or as he calls him Jed, which I prefer for typing reasons. Jed is having a meltdown, something is happening to him. A bad reaction. I was hoping he was raping or jacking it. Oh well.
Everybody is sent to another room. His face looks awful and in pain. The doctor has sedated Jed. The doctor asks how everybody else is and Arif wants to go home, to which the doctor says that he can in the morning but warns that there may be muscle aches, and it would be best to be there for the night for monitoring. That seems reasonable. Arif wakes up all sweaty, and nervous. He looks out the window and sees the hot nurse running scared from the parking lot into the darkness. He exits the room to go looking around. He sees Adam on a couch, possibly with Joni. Arif wanders down to the lobby. He rings the bell, but nobody comes. He starts running the halls. He enters the dorm area and he is all bloody. Wait, it’s not his blood. They call for the doctor or nurse. Nobody is coming. Morty, Adam, and Carmen for searching for somebody. Nobody is responding. They finally find the doctor, and he is bleeding from the head, dripping. He says to get something from the laboratory as there are unforeseen problems with the drug, and then he collapses onto his desk. They can’t get an outside line to make a phone call. God, I don’t want Joni or Katie to live. I like Morty most.
They are going to bail, but Arif has Adam’s coat and therefore the car keys. Of course, he does. They decide to get dressed and are going to try walking. They can’t figure out how to get the doors open to leave the Facility. Hahaha, jump scare. I jumped. Suddenly the security guard is outside and begging for help. Well, he comes crashing through the glass and I think that was Jed attacking him. The group runs and tries to barricade itself in. Carmen is puking in the sink. I want to see her tits. Anyway, business is picking up. We are halfway through.
Morty is suggesting Carmen is next, then he is. That will piss me off. Get rid of the hottest followed by the coolest. Carmen just slapped Katie!! Sweet. Morty has a camouflage jacket on. I appreciate that. Morty is surmising that Katie had the placebo. Sigh. Is this going to be like American Horror Story Asylum where Sarah Paulsen survives after so much because she’s a journalist? Sigh.
Morty is very Chibbs like, from Sons of Anarchy, no wonder I like him. So he knows Carmen is flipping her shit and is about to go off. He wants to sedate her, so he does. He feels it coming so he said not to really trust him either. HAHAHA, Morty just put Katie in her fucking place. Morty suggests that everybody keep getting sedated until help arrives, which puts the onus on Katie, and she is all whiny, so he just gave her the business. Joni was appreciative. Adam wants to bail, but staying there is the safest thing, despite Jed and Arif’s potential presence. Hopefully, there’s another attack soon. Holy shit, Carmen’s face is all red and blotchy. Oh man, that was nasty. I think it was bad because it was that realistic nasty as opposed to 97% of horror.
Adam has found the computer that shows the surveillance cameras. He has found Arif playing with glass, and then Jed just bashed him in the back of the head with a pole. Maybe that was the doctor and not Arif. I think it was the doctor, and his eyes were swollen shut. Hahaha, people arguing with Morty about solutions, but his sedative idea is still the best one. Time to check on Carmen. Katie wants to move her out of the room, Morty says to just kill her. Well, they agree to escort, well basically shove her out of the room to die. I have no idea why these medical stands on wheels are supposedly helping keeping the door shut. Morty is making a weird spear with a pool stick and syringes.
Adam calls Katie out for not going out and finding help while everybody else is due to suffer. Morty is take something to help his nerves and his muscles I think. Smart dude, a man of action. We see Carmen roaming the halls. Joni discovers that Katie AND Adam are part of the control (placebo) group. Then They discover somebody else is in the clinic with them. Katie and Adam are gonna go see who it is, and Morty just wants the fucking door shut. They find the guard and search for his radio. Somebody is calling for help. this attracts Arif and Jed I believe. I assume the one calling for help is the nurse. They hide, but after a minute, Adam decides that he needs to have a look. Katie starts taking pictures for her story. He comes across the doctor, I assume in his office, dead presumably. And then a nude Carmen shows up, and really saves this film. Tits and bush, a find combination on the horror nudity platter. Now if only we could have the trifecta of booty, but that is just getting greedy, right? Ladies, feel free to send me booty pics. Yes, I am aware that won’t work, but just one time, it just may.
Jed has broken into the room with Morty and Joni. Joni hides and Jed is flipping out. Jed just fucked up poor Morty. Damnit! Wait, Morty is ok. Now Adam and Katie are back with Morty and Joni and they have the radio and are talking to Madeline. Now Adam and Joni take off to find somebody. Kate and Morty are now alone. Morty has some stuff to get off his chest. He made up the rape story. Morty rambles on and then starts beating Katie’s ass. Awesome. Choking her now. Please kill her. YES, the bitch is dead.
Adam and Joni are exploring. Joni is now getting the pains. They are looking for a Toby. I think he was a helper for the doctor at the very beginning. Toby can’t do anything while the trial is still in progress. Adam is all pissy, calling Toby a murdered. Joni is turning. She goes after Adam but he holds her off with the pool stick. She goes unconscious, wait, nope, he killed her bitch ass. There’s Jed. Jed’s hands are covered in blood and he is crying. He is acting normal though.
“The trial found that adverse reactions caused by Pro9 wore off approximately 17 hours after the patients’ initial dose. the incident resulted in six fatalities. None of the deaths were officially attributed to the effects of the drug. no one from ProSyntrex has been prosecuted.” And like that, it’s over.
End film.
The 6 dead people confuses me. Joni and Katie are dead. All 4 guys along with Carmen appear to be alive, as does Madeline and Toby. The doctor and the security guy were killed. Maybe we have to assume that Carmen and Arif or Morty died later on. I don’t know.
So, I slept on this, thinking about whether I liked it. I did, but I didn’t love it. It was a cool idea, but the numbers leave a bad taste in my mouth because they weren’t specific. This film could have used 3 more minutes of closure. Just my preference. All in all, I will give this a 6.5 because I absolutely would watch it again. I recommend trying to find it. I found it on one of the Showtime stations.
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