I am guessing that this isn’t really horror, but Amazon was renting it for 99 cents and I said Hell Yeah! I have seen the 3 main stars in various other things. Meagan Good was actually in Saw V. Michael Ealy was in Barbershop 1 & 2. Dennis Quaid is Dennis F’N Quaid and you’ve seen him in stuff. I am not familiar with Deon Taylor’s work, he’s the director of this. I expect this to be a very simplistic little thriller with some reveal about Dennis Quaid having something big to hide. I’m fine with that if they do the story well enough. Just don’t be boring.
I can say that I have never had a surprise party and never want one either. I think it would actually anger me. I hope somebody reads this and thinks “I bet this guy is fun at parties”. I love when people say that because that is how you define someone’s character.
I already dislike Annie because she writes for women’s magazines about women empowerment. I bet she’s fun at parties. I am hoping that Charlie has all of his dead family upstairs, similar to George Wendt in a Masters of Horror episode. Damn, the asking price was 3.5 million. I mean, it’s a beautiful place, but damn. Just what in the hell is she wearing on moving day? The house is called Foxglove. But seriously, what in the fuck is she wearing? Overalls with only a bra up top and an open flannel shirt. It just looked stupid as hell.
Scott and Annie are the main couple and their friends are Mike and Rachel. Holy shitballs, Annie dresses so horribly. Hahaha, Charlie just showed up to randomly mow the grass. Annie invited Charlie to Thanksgiving, so there’s that. I like that Charlie seems to straight-up hate Mike but loves Annie. The tapestry is really bothering Charlie. He talks about the house having a soul. I am hoping that Charlie burns Mike alive.
I love the scene at night when the kids are out causing noise and we see Charlie for half a second in the light. Scott is just a dick. I wouldn’t want Charlie around either, but I’m an antisocial fuck. But free yard work and venison. Shit, that dude would be welcome. Hahaha, Charlie checking out Annie’s ass. I don’t feel it is fair for Scott not to be out at night for work. When you are making that kind of money, sacrifices have to be made.
Alright, Scott, time to man up and tell her to sleep in a different room. Fuck that noise. Why’s the dude always gotta go elsewhere? Scott didn’t man up. I have really lost respect for him. Oh, makeup sex time. We now find out that Charlie’s wife died via shotgun in the mouth. She really has a horrible fashion sense. He dresses nicely at least.
Scott just made such a great mistake by being a dick to Charlie in public. Dennis Quaid is in solid shape. The Ford pickup’s license plate is 5JPQ902. Got a 9 Deuce in there. I’m happy. Also, Scott got hit while jogging, most likely by Charlie. Charlie killed Peeping Tom Mike. He’s in the house watching Annie shower. She does have a very nice body, just poor fashion sense. Scott has returned home from the hospital and here’s Charlie with flowers. Scott told him to leave. I hope Annie dumps Scott for Charlie.
Scott wants a restraining order against Charlie but he has never stayed at the Royal Hotel as he told them. Annie finally has a nice outfit with the denim jacket. When I win the lottery, I fully plan on having hidden corridors in my house that only I know about.
End Film
Everything that you would have suspected to happen actually happened. This movie wasn’t trying to fool anybody. It wanted to hit its marks and ramp up the pace until Charlie really made his move and then we had the final 15-20 minutes of a showdown. All of this was done fine. I wasn’t a huge fan of how crazy that they made Charlie. I honestly would have toned it down a bit because then you could divide your audience as to which side they took. I also would have considered the idea of Charlie having an evil twin that secretly lived at the house. Now THAT would have been Kentertaining.
Here’s the problem with this type of film. There is zero replayability. You would never sit down and say that you want to see this again. What’s done is done. They clearly made it way too obvious with how long they held the camera shot on two particular items in the film, practically giving it away. I think less obvious would have been nice. The music was cringeworthy all too often. Most of the characters were or became unlikable. They did nothing new to set it apart from other thriller type films.
With all of that being said, they did exactly what they were supposed to do in this film. They took zero chances and it worked. It achieved what it wanted to and you can’t be mad at that. I am happy that I rented this. I would have gladly paid 2 or 3 dollars because it was a fun experience. If you have seen the trailer, you know whether this is something that will interest you and that’s a good thing. Also, who the hell dressed Annie?
Final Rating: 4.9 because I’ll never rewatch it but it was quality the whole way through.
All the pictures used in this blog are for review purposes. They are the property of:
- Screen Gems (presents)
- Hidden Empire Film Group
- Primary Wave Entertainment (in association with)
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