Categories
Film Reviews Horror

The Sacrament (2013)

I’ll cut right to the chase, this is a bullshit found footage movie produced by Eli Roth. After researching the film for all of 30 seconds, this sounds like a blatant rip off of the Jim Jones situation. Fortunately, I know jack shit about the Jim Jones situation, so this could be interesting for me.

So the premise, I don’t even want to get into the premise. This dude is part of some news thing.and he gets a letter from his sister or something, and he goes from NYC to Missouri, only to find she is in some country, and so he takes 2 buddies to document this trip for the news station or whatever it is. Long story short, this dude “father” has started a religious cult and a bunch of people are living on this large plot of land. Everybody is happy, they speak highly of “father”. Father speaks over a loud speaker, I enjoy that. Alright, the brothers are playing basketball, and a token white dude. We also just found out everybody sold all their property and land to father, well they turned all that over to be sold, like donated to the parish. I’d like to know what country they are even in, but assuming South America or Africa.

The main guy, not the brother, he got a sit down interview with father, and he was your typical charismatic leader who said all the right things and brushed off any hard questions. Things picked up after this party. The main guy, his name is Sam, the camera guy is Jake, the brother is Patrick. That helps clear up my name confusion. So this little girl that is a mute, she is there with her mom and her mom called them outsiders earlier. Anyway, the little girl slips Sam a letter saying “Please help us”. Now father has gotten a little pissed at them for poking their noses in his business. The sister, Caroline, just told them some lies about Patrick’s whereabouts, he’s off with 2 chicks having a 3 way and father approved this, and Caroline is high apparently. It took awhile, but business is picking up. Now for less play by play until I finish.

Uhmmm, wow, that was weak. I don’t even know if that was horror after all. It was meant to be. I’m counting it. I’m not saying it was awful. But I am not giving it higher than a 4.5. I won’t ever watch it again. If you want a found footage film about a Jim Jones type cult, this is perfect for you. If you want to kill 90 minutes with a movie about a cult, have at it. Otherwise, just move along.

I don’t own the rights to this picture or film. It’s from the film, so they are the owners, not me.

T & A Totals still didn’t change at all sadly.

13 Bare breasts

2 bare asses

2 concealed breasts

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